Please forward this to ONE friend today and tell them to subscribe here.Let’s get two things out of the way.
First, integration is a two-way street. I do agree with Derek Sivers that it’s on the immigrant to adapt and become a cultural ambassador. Taking this approach shifts the immigrant experience from one of entitled expectation to one of opportunity and cultural exchange. However, if the locals aren’t exactly open, integration can feel difficult.
Second, “assimilate into your new culture” is terrible advice, especially for older immigrants. Asking someone to discard their cultural foundations and replace them with new ones is a surefire path to extreme migratory mourning.
However, we still need to put in the effort to integrate into Canada. So how to do it? I posit that the best way is to let Canada work its way through you like elixir you didn’t know you needed. And here’s how…
Thou shall read the news. Not just the headlines or rage-bait takes on social media, but actual Canadian news. The Globe and Mail, CBC, your local paper. We all have a love-hate relationship with the news. But to understand a new place, you have to understand or maybe learn about everything from the politics to interprovincial trade disputes to municipal bylaw changes to which Tim Hortons locations are closing. Plus it’s also great fodder for water cooler conversations at work.
Thou shall visit Canada’s historic sites. Not only because you’ll fall in love with the country as you do so. But also because they are great conversation starters when you go to networking events. The Canoo app gives newcomers free or heavily discounted access to many national parks and historic sites.
Thou shall go camping. Or at least try it once. Canadians have an interesting relationship with the outdoors that borders on religious. You don’t have to become a camping aficionado, but understanding why your coworkers or neighbors disappear every long weekend will go a long way to helping you belong.
Thou shall master the sacred art of small talk. Get comfortable talking about the weather forecast, the highs and the lows, and all the little things you and the family or friends did over the weekend. Canadians are reserved, but they value the friendly, low-stakes conversations that fill those quiet moments of daily life.
Thou shall start watching hockey. You don’t need to become a superfan, but learning about your local team and watching a game or two at the sports bar is a great place to start. You also get bonus points if you learn the names of any of the hockey players featuring in the Tim Hortons commercials.
Thou shall understand that sorry means many things. Sorry can mean “excuse me,” “my bad,” “I disagree,” or the more extreme “move out of my way.”
Thou shall master the art of self-deprecation. Bragging is a firm no in Canada. Learn to downplay your accomplishments with a bit of humor. Quiet competence is a big deal here. Now this can be hard for cultures where the concept of “keeping face” or social standing is important or cultures where the leader or authority figure is supposed to project competence or confidence. One way to start is learning to make little jokes about the mistakes you made while settling into Canada.
Thou shall honor thy new province (for it’s not like others). Alberta isn’t Ontario isn’t Quebec isn’t Manitoba. Don’t assume what works in Toronto will work in Winnipeg. Learn the local quirks, understand the provincial rivalries (for example, the Battle of Alberta), and when locals say their city is different from the rest of Canada, best believe them.
Thou shall respect the wildlife (for this is their home too). In many parts of Canada, the line between the urban and the wild is blurred. You’ve probably come across Instagram reels of bears in people’s backyards, coyotes in city parks, and bobcats in the suburbs. Integrating means learning to coexist. So secure your garbage, never feed wild animals (no matter how cute), and know what to do if you come across one.
Thou shall give yourself grace. Yes, because it is hard. Like really hard. Some days you’ll make mistakes. Some days will be amazing. And that’s part of the process. And please, when you meet some not-so-nice person, don’t let that experience color your view of Canadians. Every culture has amazing and not-so-amazing humans.
A bonus commandment:
Thou shall learn the three levels of government (and which one to blame at all times). You don’t wanna go blaming the Premier of your province for the potholes on your street. You need to be an informed grumbler.
P.S: This piece was possible due to an email from
. He’s the person who suggested the First Commandment and then I went researching for the rest.
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